Loneliness, the idea terrifies me

I feel lonely. I feel I´m living an empty life although I´m surrounded by good friends who love me it´s 


not the  same. I wanna feel loved as I did a long time ago. I´m afraid of not being able to find someone 


who loves me  ever again, to spend the rest of my life alone. A lonely star in a shinny heaven. I know 


who I am, I know I am  worth it, but who cares about it on these days?


I´m only 20 years old and I´ve already wanted to commit suicide twice, self injured 17 times and 


thought  about  things that maybe other people don´t even consider in their whole life. 


This is just a summary of what´s going through my mind nowadays.